I’m catching up on my blog, so this is actually last weekend-the last weekend before starting chemo:
Hello to the weekend before I start my chemo (5/26/13). Why is it so significant? I have no idea. But I’ll be sure to let you know if it was such a big deal as I think it is. My Friday night was spent in Ybor with my cousins, followed by a weekend at the beach with the fam. My spirits are really good right now, so while this feeling is here- I’m going to take advantage of it.
Saturday comes and my spirits are high & positive. We are down in Siesta Key enjoying the sun, water & family time. Last night after everyone went to bed I really started thinking about the whole losing my hair process. I want to know what I will look like. I also worry about that moment when I first see myself in the mirror with no hair. What if I can’t even look at myself in the mirror? It makes me sad to think that for the next 6-9 months I will be hiding a big part of me-even from Justin & Gianna. I’ve read stories where some girls NEVER showed anyone their bald head. For someone who is an open book and very straightforward with those around me, hiding this seems so daunting & exhausting. I wanted to get a “sneak peak” into this new look that I will have, so I went online looking for an app or website that would show you what you look like bald. We found an app and Justin downloaded it, took my picture. My first thought was that I look like me with just no hair. Sounds pretty simple, right? But in the flesh may be a different story. I must say that it felt very normal and very comfortable playing around with this app. Anyhoo, I guess I’ll soon find out how accurate the picture was. This weekend was full of new memories and rainbows. Have I told you already what an amazing man I married? 🙂